Well, just found out yesterday that I have an unwelcome visitor.  In the interest of future posts, let us assign a name to this jerkface.  We will call it Jeffrey.  Now, I don't mean to disparage the name Jeffrey, I am sure there are many nice Jefferys out there, but I needed a name and this one will do quite nicely.

There I am, in the gastroenterologists office waiting for the results of the biopsy from the endoscopy.  Needless to say, I am nervous, but pretty much expecting some small and boring explanation for my difficulty swallowing lately.  No such luck.  Doctor walks in, sits down, sighs a bit and looks at me. 

DOC: "I don't think there is anyway to sugar-coat this.  It's Esophageal Cancer"
ME:    ".....right, so what do I do now?"

So, first introduction to Jeffery.  I must say, I think he's rather an ass.

Next steps are a CT scan, which has already been done, and an Endoscopic Ultrasound so I can get a picture of the little shit.  Perhaps I should frame it and use it as a dart board.  Both of these tests will determine what stage the cancer is in.  Until that time, I have no idea exactly what the hell Jeffery has been up to in there.  After that, we will be meeting with the surgeon, a wonderful gentleman at Northwestern Memorial in Chicago who, apparently, has been waging the war against the Jeffereys of the world for quite some time.  Then, there is the oncologist, who is also a hemotologist - I am thinking he will join the Super Friends after we have had our initial meeting with Dr. Awesome in Chicago.

Now, if anyone looks up the details of this cancer on any website, IGNORE THE STATISTICS.  They suck, they really do, but they also apply to people aged 65 years and older who have smoked their whole life and drink heavily every day.  Just believe these statistics: I am 100% confident I will kick this little shit in his ass and be running around just as crazy as ever after he's gone.

So, stay tuned here for updates and random rants, I think this may help me keep my sanity in check.